Not My Fault?
by TEAMEDWARD8
Summary: Bella Swan has been beating herself up for her mother's death for a year. With the help of her family, friends, and a new guy in school, will she be able to finally realize that it's not her fault? EXB; AH. No Jacob, sorry Jacob fans.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys, this is my first fanfiction. Thanks for reading, this story is mainly about Bella's battle with realizing the death of her mother isn't her fault. As we get more into the story we'll unwrap what really went down and why is she beating herself up. I really don't know where this story is heading, and if you have any suggestions please tell me! I'd love feedback so I can tell what you guys think I should do or change! Thank you!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Stephanie Meyer is the lucky one who gets to claim it.**

**Prologue**

As I laid there I finally began to realize the reality. How could one day contain so much? But finally as my eyelids began to cave in against my will, the worst day of my life was over. How was I supposed to know it would only go down hill from there?

**I could just make out the light in the distance. I ran farther to see if I could finally reach it, but if just kept getting farther. When all the sudden the voice of that man sent an icy, cold shiver down my back. I ran faster until I could barely breathe but I kept going from the fear of the footsteps behind me getting closer. Finally, I realized that the footsteps were right behind. The air was immediately filled with my high pitched scream. But it was stopped short from the instant pain I felt from just the slightest touch of the man behind me.**

I woke up screaming, I stopped quickly knowing it was only a bad dream. I listened for a few seconds to make sure I hadn't woken up my brother or father. Not a sound, I guess they were used to it by now. I didn't know how Emmett and my father Chief Charlie Swan (don't worry I just call him dad) were so…how could you put it, call about it. Our lives have been so rough this last year and I know my constant freaking out only made it worse on them. If only they knew I was skipping the therapy sessions they had set up for me. I felt instantly guilty, reminding myself not to think about that. All that money going to waste, especially when there wasn't much to being with.

My brother was so protective of me and I know if he knew he'd personally drive me over there himself. Charlie and Emmett had been so good to me. But, they weren't there to witness my mother's death, and they don't have to blame themselves everyday for her dying. I should be the one dead not her. I should've declined the invitation that day to go to Port Angeles with my mother, Renee. I shouldn't have made it seem so important that we check out that new bookstore in the bad part of the city because I heard they had an old copy of my favorite book, Wuthering Heights. I should've told her to leave as soon as we noticed the scary looking man in back of us. I should've called the police as soon as we heard his footsteps getting closer. I should've screamed louder when he grabbed mom. I should've done something, but I didn't. And it'll be my fault forever.


	2. Chapter 2

"Bella? Bella? Get UP!" exclaimed an excited voice right in my ear. "Gotta get up, get up, gotta get up, I won't stop until you get up," he sang into my ear.

"Come on Emmett, I'm up, and that song it for babies." I said, but he was already out the door. I swiftly got into the shower and then dressed. I never cared too much for style, but today for some reason I felt like dressing up a little. I put on my blue cashmere sweater and skinny jeans. I threw on a little blue eye shadow, eyeliner, and lip gloss. I didn't need any blush I did that enough with out having to make it more prominent. I put my hair half up, half down and ran outside grabbing a cereal bar.

"Jeesh Bells, how long does it take you," Emmett said quite annoyed as I hopped into Rosalie's BMV. Rosalie was Emmett's girlfriend, she could be a little mean but we all learned to deal since Emmett was so in love with her. She had a twin brother named Jasper who was in the other seat in the back.

"Hey Bella," he muttered quietly. Jasper wasn't one for talking. When Rosalie and Jasper first moved to Forks I kind of liked Jasper, but they soon passed as I realized he didn't really have any interest in me or really anyone in our school. For a while I thought he was gay until I discovered the Sports Illustrated magazines in his room.

"Hey Jasper! Sorry Rose," I said apologizing. "I didn't mean to keep you guys waiting."

"Oh, it was no problem Bella, we found ways to fill the time," she said. Making Jasper and I feel instantly uncomfortable, not even wanting to imagine our siblings doing things 'to fill their time'.

"Ok, can we go please, I have to be the tour guide for the new kids today," said Jasper. He seemed a little anxious to get to school.

"Who's that?" I asked casually. New kids at Forks High School was probably the second most exciting thing to happen this year since Jessica Stanley wore too short shorts and got sent home.

"Oh, um hold on," he said. He dug around in his backpack for a minute. I finally got whatever he was looking for. "Well, boy and a girl. There last name is Cullen. Boys name is Edward and girls name is Alice. Alice is younger but skipped a grade so is in your grade along with Edward…" But I didn't hear him after he said the name Edward. Instantly I was drawn to that name. For some reason I loved it, it made me instantly happy. For a minute I was trying to realize what he looked like, and then I thought back, happy? I haven't been happy in months, how could this boy's name make me happy? I quickly snapped back into reality in time to hear Jasper finish up his information on them.

"Cool," I quickly replied. All the sudden I really didn't feel like talking. I just looked out the window and watched the rain fall and listened to the sound of the raindrops hitting Rose's car's roof.

We reached school in a matter of 10 minutes thanks to Rose's crazy driving. I quickly ran to class not wanting to be late. In school no one really noticed me. I was just kind of there. Besides Emmett, Rose, and Jasper my only friend was really Angela Webber and Mike Newton but they hung out with Lauren and Jessica who didn't like me very much.

I entered the classroom thinking about the calculus homework I didn't finish last night when I saw someone sitting in my seat. That person had messy bronze hair. As he turned around I felt very stupid when he said all too casually, "I'm sorry am I in your seat?" No, I'm sorry he didn't say it he sang it in his wonderful voice. He looked amazing. There weren't enough words to describe his perfect face. His eyes were an amazing emerald green that made me forget what I wanted to say.

"Uh, we-uh, th-. Yeah, my seat." Great, way to go Bella. Probs for you.

"Oh sorry," he said and chuckled lightly. He got up swiftly and floated over to the vacant seat behind me. "There you go; by the way my name is Edward Cullen." So he was the new guy.

"Nice to meet you, my name is Bella Swan." I said way too quietly for someone with normal hearing to hear. But somehow he managed.

"So. This is Forks huh?" he said in a teasing tone. He obviously wasn't very impressed but who could blame him. It's Forks.

"Yup. In all it's glory." I tried so say back smoothly but it came out making it sound like I was mentally challenged. He laughed.

"Uh, I just wanted to say th-", he was cut off by the teacher, Mr. Brown, coming in.

"Morning class. I believe we have a new student. Everyone say hello to Edward Cullen. Now Edward we're already half way into the year but luckily Ms. Bella Swan is new too. I'm sure she'll help you out." As soon as he said this Edward's face broke out into a grin. "Bella would you mind showing him around for the rest of the day.

"Of course Mr. Brown," I answered quietly and I'm absolutely sure the only way he knew I said yes was because I nodded my head up and down.

"Excellent now let's pick up in our textbook where we left off yesterday. Page 345…" I'm sorry to say but I didn't hear one more word that my teacher said that day. Because the whole time Edward kept playing with a piece of my hair. I don't know why he was I guess he was bored and didn't even realize he was because as soon as the bell rang he shot up like someone had just fired a gun.

"Bloody hell." He said when he sat back down to gather his books. I stood up next to him, my stuff already stacked in my hands. "I'm sorry I really didn't know what I was doing," he said sheepishly.

"It's fine," I said embarrassed. "What's your next class I'll show you where it is,"

"Uh..hold on." He said getting his schedule out of his binder. "I have English next."

"Oh. So do I." I said sheepishly as if I was the reason this was happening. "Let's go." But as soon as we walked out of the math building there was a siren going off.

"LOCK DOWN. LOCK DOWN." The loud speaker was screaming at us. No one else was even left in the courtyard.

"Well don't stand around," Edward said laughing. "Let's go hide." He looked around and the closest hiding spot was the girl's bathroom. He grabbed my hand and ran in. Luckily no one was in there. But it's really awkward standing in the girl's bathroom next to the feminine product dispenser with the hottest man alive.

"Lovely hiding place," I said as he locked the door laughing. When all the sudden I heard a laugh from outside that caused my blood to stop flowing. I fell to the floor in a shaking heap.

"Bella what's wrong. Don't cry Bella, its ok. I locked the door." He said while hugging me. He wiped my tears away and begged me not to worry.

"It's him," which was all I could muster out. Luckily he took it and just held me for what felt like forever. I realized at the point that I couldn't hide behind my shell anymore and I'd have to tell someone what happened. And I don't know why but I chose to tell Edward, but I did. I needed him even though I didn't know him.


End file.
